HOST: Our next call is from Curt in Rhode Island. What have you got for us today, Curt?

That is how I met my wife. My best friend (best man at the wedding!) got her number, had her hang out with the crew a few times, I got her number because... competition and whatnot, and now we are married.

“When he does his grabbing, he doesn’t go tiptoeing around all those thousands of rules of sexual assault.”

I am shocked to learn that Billy was the captain of the lacrosse team at Colby. Shocked

I don’t think “Bill is worse” is going to work, no matter how many times they repeat it. That video has legs, and attacking a woman (even Hillary) for her husband’s decades-ago affairs is going to play just as poorly with a lot of voters.

“My new jobs program will also be my plan for solving the problem of student debt! When I’m president, every college student can choose the regular student loans, which are for losers, or they can go to my new program - they can sign up with a company, maybe Trump Tower, which is a great place, we have the best…

Hey, HEY. Show some respect. That’s a Wharton business school grad you’re talking about!

and gold is tanking at the same time #makesyouthink

I thought I detected the nasal-y whinge of a Pacific Northwesterner, whiteman edition.

Even before he destroyed his friend’s bike, you could tell he’s an asshole.

At least she’s paid taxes on those hundreds of millions on a regular basis.

So if Hillary doesn’t win, is James going to be so frustrated with being on the losing side that he’ll switch to endorsing Trump in 2020 and then, when his need to have been part of a winning campaign has been fulfilled, go back to endorsing Hillary when she takes another crack at the White House in 2024?

This is an idea that might catch on. I would like Ashley Feinberg to write my tweets for me. Both of my followers would be thankful.

I won the debate if you decide without watching the totally one-sided “spin” that followed. This despite the really bad microphone.

His supporters are too stupid to even understand what this means.

And diverting water from 3/4 of the bathrooms for irrigation.

The Israeli club retaliated by appropriating the fertile portions of the stadium for farming.

I’m so sick and tired of you liberals endangering my children with allowing sexual deviants and predators into their bathrooms.

Chicago did it first:

shut the fuck up