The first thing I thought when I saw that pizza is "That looks like the worst pizza ever." Turns out I was right.

I look forward to the day where I'm not arrested and charged with a crime for simply smoking a joint WHERE I LIVE.

Yeah, the foreign exchange students back in high school- François! Diego! WTF R U DOING

Negative parties... He'll have to throw parties he's not invited to.

-Remember that time I wrote a poorly-worded and confusing email to you that was just a hair under the length of the Infinite Jest?

-I do, ole chap! I had such a silly haircut back then. Welp, let's bury the hatchet and get back to completely ruining the entire fucking world.

Reminds me of a joke I like telling Harvard students when I'm near campus:

I hope this kid emailed back "lolol didn't read."

Come on — they'll both have a good laugh about this at the I-bank in 5 years after they've just closed the big merger that will put 16,000 people out of work....

In my experience, the kinds of guys who would do public proposals without an already-discussed "yes" are the ones who have absolutely no boundaries, and are merely egging on the rest of the no-boundary-having men out there, perpetuating the idea that women think this sort of thing is "romantic." These are the same men…

Maybe my story will make you feel better!

It's not necessarily a rational decision though.

That's what my husband and I did. The idea of a 'proposal' was stupid and awkward to me. Besides, I knew he was the man I would marry about 30 minutes into our first real conversation (though I wisely kept that bit to myself). I also refused to get an engagement ring or spend a bunch of money on some shiny rock…

Even if he's not an asshole but just stupid, the woman is as entitled to her response as he was to ask in the first place. Further, I'm simply not on board with women protecting men's delicate fee-fees at the expense of their own. He will get over it, and it will take less than a lifetime.

A guy I was friends with chose a couple of days after my sister's death as the perfect time to tell me he loved me. I called him to tell him she died and he was like, "I'm on my way," ignored me telling him he really, reaaaally didn't need to drive 6 hours to come to my house, and then kept trying to cuddle up to me…

Obligatory.

If you're going to publicly propose, than the possibility of being publicly told no is something you should be prepared for.

Why should she have to ignore her own feelings on the matter in order for him to save face? Making a public proposal like that without having the conversations to make sure she's on board with marriage is kind of a sociopathic move in the first place. If she doesn't want to marry him, she gets to say no in front of…

I don't know. I think it's kind of a asshole move. Like, 'I kinda know you might say no so I'm going to make it as public as possible to force you to say yes'. Fuck that.

Egg?

I know someone who has been engaged maybe 3 times. They've all happened wildly fast, and ended the same. She's not that great, and I'm all, "How do you keep getting men to propose to you?!"