Saying that someone is “butt” in a particular competition based on 10 games, on the heels of a season with 25 goals in that competition, and 285 goals in the last 8 seasons, is really bad analysis.

Deadspin’s Twitter doesn’t include the name of an article’s author.

I knew from the headline that this was going to be some dumbass Haisley article, and yet, I clicked.

I know a kid who went to Rome with his church choir and was scheduled to sing at St. Peter’s for a Sunday mass. They obviously went out for way too long on Saturday, but managed to drag themselves to St. Peter’s in the morning. This kid, hungover as he was, vomited while singing, passed out, and came to with two nuns…

Worst place to be hungover: Adventure Aquarium in Camden.

Rhythmic Weightlifting.

I highly doubt there’s any sort of indictment coming. Far more likely that a guy who’s used to working with zero meaningful criticism is getting some, from fans, media, and far more importantly, the organizations with whom US Soccer regularly works (USASA, AYSO, etc.). That’s a jarring shift, and he probably doesn’t…

I used to get 5-6 colds + 1 sinus infection annually. I started taking Emergen-C regularly (at least 5 times a week) about 4 years ago. Now I get maybe 2 colds a year, and they’re significantly reduced in severity and duration.

My girlfriend and I have been dating for 6.5 years, so we’re not in too much of a rush to get married. Having said that, I already know what my two responsibilities for the wedding are: 1) desserts 2) plan the entire honeymoon. I’m good with this.

I’m putting money on the fact that Billy doesn’t know the difference between Schalke and Hamburg, since they have similar color schemes and have regular American contributors.

If he’s upset about the circumstances of a November friendly, imagine what he’d do when you tell him that McKennie spent 7 years in an MLS academy.

The issue with VAR is that decisions in soccer are rarely based on simple binary questions. Goal-line technology works well because the question is “did the entire ball cross the line?” Rendering decisions on penalties or cards is different, because the question becomes something like “did the contact in this incident…

I was roommates with a girl who is family friends with Chris Evans, and I would be shocked if he was ever implicated in anything like this. Everything she ever said about him portrayed him to be exactly the person you’d expect.

I don’t love the hard stop at the end of a half, but otherwise, you’re on to something.

I’m assuming this is a joke? If it’s not, the clock stops in college soccer after a goal, so he’s making that signal to tell the timekeeper to stop the clock.

If you decide to get deep dish, plan on making that the last thing you do that night.

I went to an Indonesian place a few weeks ago in a group of 4. We did a tasting menu that gave us, essentially, 15 appetizer-sized dishes. It was a perfect amount of food.

Saw the headline, immediately knew it was Lazio. Might as well rename the club Nazio.

Zukka 2020. If you need a campaign manager, I’ll do it for free.

How did you get to, presumably, adulthood without ever finding out what a dog musher is? Were you homeschooled?