@ScaryMerry: That's what I'd get for a reader if/whenever I get one.

The joke's on him. His grandfather reeeally didn't like him.

Careful... Don't whiz on the electric fence!

Oh, Billy! You're always late!

@ripfire4: Oh Billy! You're always late.

@Killjoy: I felt as though I had acquired the power to manipulate time and space when an Ikea salesperson directed me through one of the 'fake' doors into the next department as a shortcut.

This just in: Cheap impulse items displayed at checkout counters to encourage you to spend more.

Perfectly ruined by the razors. Double-edge razors or bust. (kudos to those of you who said straight razor, but you're on your own...)

I love my iron Underwoods and Royals. I'm up to 4 now, and there are still some gems out there at reasonable prices.

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DO *NOT* OPEN IT!

(In before "Da Bomb!")

@Moebius: What if it was so far away that the planet we crash it into is ours. Wraparound!

Let's not forget to mention that it's also available for Android mobiles and tablets too, eh?

@PPLS: Touché.

If the chart had any comparative data on relative consumption rates, it'd move from 'Heh' to 'Ba-ZINGA!'.

If you look closely behind Chekov's left shoulder, you can see a bit of one of the security officers.

What's with the dick in the top-right corner?

Link? Oh yeah. Here it is.

Will I be able to buy e-book discards for 10 cents?

Great. Now it'll be 3x as bad.