No, they were supercalifragilisticexplialidopeness.

Awww, I feel for your 10-year old self. I, too, was 5'9" at the age of ten - and I'm a woman. That was the year I stopped trick or treating because some nosy lady shamed me with "Aren't you too old for this?" And let's not even talk about how hard it was being 8 and having to wear adult sized shoes when all my friends…

Lacks in the monogrammed thermos department, though.

Lacks in the monogrammed thermos department, though.

While I do feel for our protagonist (as a person) in the Chuck-E-Cheese story, I would have been laughing maniacally at the image of the decapitated rat. I have an unmitigated hated of that place, going back over 25 years...

did you know it's a violation of the geneva convention to broadcast pictures of delicious cookies to people who currently do not have, and cannot at present go get, delicious cookies? i'll see you at the hague.

I know I say this at the risk of all you kids deciding I'm "square" rather than "dope" and "slammin'", but, uh, the baker story? If someone offered me and my staff a tray of edibles without warning everyone what they were, hiring them would be RIGHT off the table and I'd more than likely call the cops, especially if…

This might have supplanted "He save bread!" as my new favorite story.

He proudly returned to his fellow Lords of the Flies and proclaimed, "Chuck E.'s a girl! And she's got tits like THIS!" making the (in)appropriate gesture most commonly associated with such a statement.

That's because you're thinking like a human being. You need to put yourself in the mindset of a short-term-profit-maximizing sociopath. Actually, even then, it seems pretty silly.

Eat Mor Corprat Bulees

starred this comment just because of your screen name.

This is really terrific Disney Villainess hair.

"It makes one wonder, why do you not just get up and leave. Or why do you not as a woman tell a man who's making advances that you're not comfortable with, 'You know what? Stop. Leave.'"

Does she really carry an orange pen and wear orange-y scarves to reinforce her pathetic, self-proclaimed 'Princeton' brand? I'd like to complete the look by stuffing a large Navel orange into her mouth so we never have to hear any argle-bargle from her again.

Deep in the pockets of the sinister Paisley Mafia and the powerful Oversized Hair Clip Lobby

Why is the bitch still getting interviewed?

My kid thought Goldfish were all named Dorothy because of Elmo. We had a couple called, "The Dorothies".

She's 16 now and a little *feisty* so I cling to these memories so that I do not kill her.

Maybe he only liked Matthew and couldn't figure out why that annoying William always had to be there, too.