This is shaping up to be the lamest start of a console generation in history. PlayStation’s big first party exclusive is a Spider-Man DLC (which I would buy day 1 if it was on PS4, or if the PS5 was more appealing otherwise yet, because Spider-Man rules) and Xbox’s is nowhere to be found. It’s just depressing.…

Is there information on how much data a typical kotaku page uses? This page alone has 7 ads and an autoplaying video

WAIT WHAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTT????? DOES CHRIS GET A FAREWELL PAGE?? WHO’S GONNA RUN HIGHLIGHT REEL??? WHOSE FEET DO I NEED TO COVER IN CEMENT AND DROP INTO THE HUDSON RIVER (with or without the rest of the body attached) TO GET HIM HIS JOB BACK??????

Yep, I’ve been put into 3-team matches where we have one less person than other two teams. I also got into one where we had one more person than the other two teams. 

“It’s launching on July 16 for PC, PlayStation 4, and PC...”

It has to do with Gailim’s second sentence in which he/she references their shareholders. Here is the direct quote:

Why? Well, obviously because he’s a film actor and we understand that movies are pretend. But also because we see him break character! From time to time, we get to see him being who he actually is - a kind and decent human being.

And with Betsy Devos as the Secretary of Education AND supposedly behind the buffoons looking to end the lockdown now, American education will trail the schooling of fish!

Tree Branches are infinite, you can just keep shaking the same tree and eventually more will come out, unless there is no place for them to drop, in which case you can pick up the ones you have and keep shaking for more.

Fruit trees take 3 days to regrow their fruit. I know this might seem obvious but I know a lot of…

Jason does it again. His highest profile target yet

Slight difference between modifying your car for performance and modifying it to intentionally pollute. Like the difference between an athlete wearing tight spandex to run faster and a guy flashing kids in a trenchcoat. In both examples, my child self becomes a bit more familiar with the shape of adult male genitalia,…

You can’t believe it because you’re privileged enough not to have to deal with the actual issues that the people who are made to wear these sorts of uniforms in real life have to deal with, and you’re also not empathetic enough to understand the perspective of another fellow human being, and how such a thing might…

Dammit, you chucklefuck, your intentions were perfectly clear. You wanted to hurt and embarrass a total stranger because some stray gross impulse darted across your lizard brain and being a white male, you never even thought to resist or question it. You honestly expected her to find that funny or at least “laugh it…

Jason, I’m an angry nerd on the internet. My neckbeard flows long, and full. There are no prisoners. 

To be fair, she was only three weeks old.

Nobody seems to care about the fact that there are men out there that are being manipulated by these women.

First I go home and make love to YOUR wife 

The face of the man behind White in the header; look at it.

His advice: Get a federal permit to kill one of the vultures, then hang it in a tree or other spot where other vultures can see it for miles around.

The United States of America didn’t do that.