Mr. Cook leaves behind a loving family, his beloved tabby cat named Fluff, and the lingering sense that there had better be one hell of a funny punchline at the end of this whole Mitch Albom thing.

[checks Facebook]

This is hilarious.

Ha!

Oh, it turns out, those were just a list of reasons why Family Guy sucks.

Ha!

Terrible. Just terrible. I love it.

Oh goddammit, I had a funny joke there. DIE U SCUM

Good luck, guys. Can't wait to see what you come up with.

That's good.

Ha!

Well hold on now, because Tiger wasn't the only veteran golfer apologizing for his Ryder Cup performance this past weekend. While not technically a participant, an abashed John Daly was obliged to ask forgiveness from his fellow golfers for absconding with the trophy for 45 minutes on Saturday afternoon so that he…

Nobody deserves it less than you, shitface.

Ha!

+1

Idiot. +1

This isn't the point, though, is it? The point is that Wilbon needlessly antagonized the very people who made his career, then backtracked like a coward, then trashed a colleague who dared to disagree with him, because he is a professional troll and a hack and a sack of shit. That doesn't have much to do with DC's…

This is great.

Ha! That's totally not my intention, and I apologize. But RBI is an interesting case, to me, because its value is determined totally by what you're hoping to get out of statistics.