Damn it, Doug. I'm about to start an organization to raise money for you so that you never have to work, and therefore write, again in your life.

I'd send the response card back. I'd send it back with "HAHAHAHAHAHA FUCK NO" written on it. I'd take a bite out of the corner and write "OMG, sorry! SO HUNGRY!" below it. Then I'd draw a dick on it. Because I'm mature.

Why is an article entitled "The Ten Best Places to Hide Crap In Your Car" accompanied by a photo of a woman hidden in a car?

Loving the shit out of gothy parents with their little ray of sunshine loungin out on the grass. HELLA CUTE!