The modem adaptation has Gregor Sansa transforming into Bret Stephens, which is much more harrowing

Suicide is the only solution. 

Bret Stephens is a narcissistic cricket.

“Krylon Glossy Jungle Green”

“I challenged him to come to my home, and call me a bed bug in front of my family. It would be a very cool affair. I would simply ask him to look my children straight in the eye, spit on them, and call me a bed bug. Afterword, my wife would make a lovely meal, we would call up our extended family and gather round, to…

I guess a DJ could know Clinton’s victory song via google. But to think to play it.

I think one of the worrying things is there’s mention of going after journalists’ family members, which is (and should be) profoundly sobering. Kids, parents, siblings, spouses and in-laws aren’t public people. Politicians (rightly) get incensed when minor children (remember the Bush girls?) get dragged for acting…

So what is really at the heart of the respectable media’s panicked and outraged reaction to the news that right wingers are searching their social media for things to troll them with?

Some call her the gangster of love.

It’s not like nuking a hurricane would have *no* effect. If you seed a 100mph cyclone with fresh radioactive fallout, I think it’s safe to say that the hurricane will no longer be your biggest problem.

 The difficulty of retrieving your fist after it schlorrrps through all that blubber?

I’m friends with all my exes. A room full of my ex-partners would be, well, a typical party. “Oh, hey everyone, what’s up? Y’all want to throw some burgers on the grill?”

I’m on team hand here.

I used to say "That'll do, pig" on the tennis court. I let it slip during a mixed doubles match. My wife was my partner. I'm divorced.

“Let’s Go!” is only acceptable in the style of Captain Tenneal from Most Extreme Elimination Challenge

a guy with a brain injury.

I’m a white woman in San Francisco. I could run past City Hall and back without any problem. Plus, I'm just fat enough to get a bunch of semi encouraging, semi patronizing "you go girl!"s as I do it. #bodypositivity

My mom told me her favorite part of parenting was playing tricks on my sister and me. Now I’m a dad and I get it. My kid is only one but I have plans, man. Looking forward to the pranks.

I just can’t figure out why anyone gives any shits about what a celebrity does outside of what made them famous. I care when my favorite musicians tour, I care when my favorite actors or directors or whoever is involved in a film, and I care when my favorite sports figures are playing/doing well or whatever.