"That is what completely owning a football game looks like." (Hums a few bars of ""Dixie.")

Aye

I'm not surprised he's an Old Testament kind of guy. He's obviously in favor of an i for an i.

The Rams' greatest regret is drafting Sam Apology.

Considering how many holes Mike Brown ended up with in his arms and hands, they couldn't very well declare it defensive.

Thinking you're doing something tangible or noble by sitting shiva and hand-wringing on a dick joke website is vain and clueless.

If I was heartless, I would have said Indiana University is still hoping to offer him a scholarship if he transfers.

+1 goddamn that's good

They knew he was an OSU player right away, because if he'd been from any other Big Ten program the dumpster would have been on fire.

So, you're thinking JJ Abrams, right?

+1!

+1

Our use of euphemism and hypersensitive language is getting ridiculous. 'Fed-up?' Let's just be real and say it: LeGarrette Blount is pleasantly plump.

+1

Bullshit, Tom. Jordan's baby wouldn't go to sleep until Magic's, Larry's, and Isaiah's went to sleep first.

Not really that impressive. After all, Kim Kardashian makes 10 million every week by flopping a set.

+1

"Kings And Nuggets Present A Very Special Triple Flop"

"Oh you think you're a little teapot, do you, Eli? No, I'M a little teapot! I'm steaming mad and I'm gonna boil over. See, here is my handle and here is my other handle. Wait...Goddammit, will ya look at me? I'm a sugar bowl! You see what you've done to me, Manning? I'm a flingin-flangin sugar bowl!"

Valar what gullis?