Ahhhh.... Maybe that's their plan all along, what with eight year olds shooting grandmothers. Maybe their time would be better spent shooting virtual humans instead of real ones. Brilliant!

Don't remind me. A recent move to a different state has left me in a situation where my money is needed elsewhere. After only a slight splurge on the Steam Summer Sale, I find myself with a list of necessities that must be purchased before video games. I hate being poor.

True. I did the dishes today.

Because they have a conspiratorial plan to keep us all locked away in our homes playing GTAV instead of going out and doing something productive for society.

This looks more like a proper Final Fantasy game than the other most recent Final Fantasy games. It seems more Final Fantasy 6, and less... black clothes, guns and brooding.

A town I used to live in as a kid was coming down on kids running lemonade stands for not having the proper business licenses in place and not complying with proper food safety standards.

Oh don't get me wrong. I am absolutely 100% certain it could be done. It would just require a bit more effort to make it happen for the 3ds than it would for the platforms it was just announced for.

Believe it or not, but those Android and iOS are platforms with more horsepower than the 3ds, as nice as the 3ds is.

All of those platforms have more horsepower than the 3ds. It wouldn't be impossible, but the game would need to be retooled quite a bit to make it. I very, very much want to play it on my own 3ds. Maybe later?

Wait... really? Or is that just wishful thinking.

Are you an adult? If so, there's really no reason why you can't have a simple Visa debit card from your bank. This will simply and easily link with Google wallet, and make every purchase almost too easy.

Smashing.

I feel compelled to put on the kettle before playing this game. Somehow, playing it without a nice cup of tea next to my keyboard feels like a disservice.

The problem for me is not the subscription fee. It's the game itself. The only two pieces of news that interested me at all about this game were;

The cows sound like the gray aliens from South Park.

Now we just need Oculus Rift support for an automatic vomit inducer! I love how the background music from Wreck it Ralph seems to fit perfectly.

This is genius. They could create a buggy mess of the game, but because the game is set in a Matrix-like simulation, glitches are features, not problems.

While it does sound a bit better, I was hoping they would have ditched the MIDI sounding music apparent there and bring out the fully orchestrated soundtrack. Nothing like real instruments to get the blood pumping.

"That's not very Jasspunk."

Absolutely. Seconded. Also, Ni No Kuni has a very Pokemon kind of mechanic, though I don't know if it's "mature" enough for your tastes. I believe I first described it as "adorable and kind of heartbreaking".