You could make a necklace out of the little bones and be a witch doctor for Halloween!

Or from what I understand, just a regular person in Portland.

..said Ripley to the android, Bishop?

Sugar? This is America. We use HFCS.

STOP BAITING ME

This can’t be real. This can’t be real. This can’t be real.

celery leaves

something something eating her noodles

butcher dogs are SO GOOD

..Sin City?

oh no i meant like just making a dish like those fancy ones you see with the egg and a bunch of things

i feel like i need to break myself down and start over completely it is so bad

I’m tweeting Kenji to help me learn how to make noodles :(

hot dogs are about the limit of my ability lately, i am so useless in a kitchen the last month

I’m confused, because at no point did you mention hot dogs.

OH MAN WE COULD PUT THIS ON BANH MI HOT DOGS

mi brazo
mi pierna
mi cabeza

my favorite word in spanish is cacahuetes!

but is that like how people say “vent-ay” for 20 instead of “bent-ay”? holy shit i remember a lot of spanish suddenly, thank you arizona childhood

HOW ARE YOU GREY AGAIN

I only have red miso on hand, I wonder if that might be a better burger topping since the stronger flavor would stand out more.

pelase tell me you’re finally off keto and we can go to town on some dim sum

Oh I’m a garbage human being, but mom is mom.

Join the club. I fucked up more boxed brownie mixes that I can remember because I used the wrong pan.