I have an 8 year old that I routinely lock out of the router so she can’t watch shit-ass YouTube videos on her laptop.

“I can’t get to the Internet!”
“Yeah, I locked you out for being a dick.”
“Dad-DEEEE!”
“Eat shit, pumpkin. This is a House of Laws.”

I remember asking my father as a child (I think around 4th grade) why he never videotaped my school concerts or performances like the other parents (back in the day of giant camcorders, which we didn’t own). And he replied, “All week you’ve been complaining about this stupid concert, and now you want me to videotape…

Such a ridiculous double standard when it comes to catching your spouse masturbating. The few times I’ve caught my wife or found out about it later I’m like “Hey now, that’s hot...want some company?” But whenever she catches me it’s all “Gross! What’s wrong with you? At least wait until the funeral is over!”

Bob #1: What’s your job title?

Rams are giving up 6.9 yards per plays to the Saints.

I don’t see what’s the big deal. It went ten yards!

It’s more like j’GWAR

Of course he got the big heavy massage chairs from Brookstone- I think they’re the D Series Massage Collection. If he was smarter, he’d have gotten the smaller, lighter, but superior E-Series. I think we all know, though, that Flacco would never buy the E lite.

Oh my God, that header gif! Yes!

This is what I immediately pictured.

BAC TO THE FUTURE

Chris Blewitt

“What’s for dinner?”

Remembered that the president controls less than we think and that this is hardly the first time we’ve had a shitty conservative president. Went back to everyday life.