If you look hard, racism doesn’t actually make a whole lot of sense to begin with. I mean, do any of their leaders or new outlets even attempt formal logic anymore?

Nah. Hippies are dumb enough on their own.

Yes. That’s how US elections work. It is literally the Green Party voters’ fault that Bush won Florida, and Trump won Michigan and Pennsylvania.

I don’t know about the best fictional cat, but the best fictional KAT:

Poe’s lesson is: “It’s entirely possible for other people to know better than you, no matter how amazing you think you are, and when you join a military force, you are expected to follow the orders of your commanding officers, even if they’re ladies.”

I always check the back to see what the blurb is.

No Rusty Ventures?

This is really...

Also acceptable: Archduke Franz Purrdinand

Killmonger. Dormammu. Pain Spiral. Annihilus. Scarscream. Sgt. Hatred. Armagezzmo. Baron Von Pocalypse. Razorface. Slaughterfoot. Darth Maul. Furioso. Scratch Bleedman. The Mad Shitter What Shits At Midnight. Bloody Marty. The Toxic Avenger. Li’l Hitler. Malekith. Jack the Ripper. The Cat-Ass Chainclaw Massacre.…

Christopher Robin: It’s Pooh! I love— wait. What the hell is this? They bleached him?! MY Pooh, the REAL Pooh, is the golden color of honey on toast. THIS Pooh looks like someone rubbed him in mayonnaise! WHY DO YOU HAVE TO CHANGE THINGS? WHY CAN’T YOU MAKE IT THE WAY I WANT? Next you’ll be telling me, “Oh, Kanga is…

On Marc Maron’s show, David Sedaris talked about the time Rosanne randomly called him up at midnight (she got his number from a theater or booking agent or something), apparently just to have someone to talk at for an hour.

I completely believe that Tom Cruise could shatter his own ankle on command through sheer force of will.  Like Riggs in Lethal Weapon 2, he’s just standing there, then you hear a bunch of cracking sounds, and Tom falls over and asks for all the ambulances.

And THEN, if you click on the source article, after all this went down, Tom Cruise broke his ankle and production had to be delayed anyway for pretty much the exact amount of time it would have taken for Cavill to shave, do reshoots, and regrow his mustache.

Of course they won’t rehire him. None of the letters of support said anything like, “...or we won’t appear in GotG3 either,” and none of the petitions threatened any sort of organized boycott of the movie. No one was willing to put up any stakes, and no threat was posed to Disney or their bottom line.

I remember when he took the limo out to buy his staff Five Guys.

I can’t recall the taste of food, nor the sound of water, nor the touch of grass.  There’s nothing-- no veil between me and the wheel of fire.  I can see him with my waking eyes!

Sigh. You buy a pack of hot dogs and hot dog buns from the store. You put the hot dogs in the buns to make a hot dog sandwich, and then, because “hot dog sandwich” is a cumbersome and unwieldy phrase, you shorten it back to just “hot dog,” because English just makes so much sense, you guys.

I just learned the other day that shortbread is named for the chemically short strands of gluten in the dough, which is why it’s crumbly rather than chewy.