Author: Mr. Trump is a child, but rest assured that adults are in the room.

......... you’re going to have to be waaaaayyyyyy more specific there.

That fucking shoe launch makes it.

I was worried the jokes might have been a little flat.

Don’t forget, because it was the year 19-aught-dickety, one of the horses also went out and banged a whorse. 

Old timer here. Did I ever tell you youngsters about the one year in the Federal League when they allowed runners to circle the bases as many times as they could. To counteract this they allowed the outfielders to ride horses. Well one day wouldn’t you know it old Cap Anson hits a line drive right into a horse’s…

My god man, stop whatever it is you’re doing to them. Just leave yourself alone!

I get it though. I was like 30 before I could tell the difference between Clark Kent and Superman. Glasses can make you be anyone.

Don’t be silly. You shoot TVs. 

Oh no, wait, he has your money...

Really? I’m definitely going to In N Out for lunch to investigate, but I’m ALSO definitely boycotting after a I return a few times to make sure it wasn’t a one-off thing.

We all laugh, but I’m starting to get the impression that the people who say “I’m a Christian first, and a conservative second” around the dinner table are in actuality neither Christian, nor conservative.

This post is just as racist as those represented in it because it lacks diversity.

I bet you were pissed when you found out that Julius Erving wasn't a real doctor. 

I’m begging you to keep digging this extremely stupid hole. 

he’s all about the timing.  Makes you wonder what huge load of Mueller indictments are coming tomorrow.

C’mon, Maya Angelou never said that.

Yes, the AV Club should get back to......not reporting on......things. Wait. I’m confused.

Yeah totally if there’s been one lesson to learn from the past year it’s if you don’t like something just ignore it it’ll go away! Thanks for doing your part