fart city is one of my favorite places. my husband and i crack up each time one of us farts bigtime. we’re 12.

Hi Jezzies! Sorry to post this here on SNS, but it must be done.

Men don’t like them if you call them a cunt, that’s for sure.

So what would be the male equivalent of cunt? Is there any pejorative word out there to be thrown at men that would resonate in the same way? Or that they wouldn’t wear as a badge of honor.

It’s so ridiculous that public figures use the excuse “I got hacked!” to excuse themselves when they write something stupid.

A lot of people are coming forward to call Hillary a cunt. I guess it’s satisfying to men to demean a woman who’s this close to becoming the next President of the United States. I doubt any of the previous 43 presidents have ever had to worry about getting called a cunt.

SEE

Speaking of word-play costume:

Costume looks cool. Maybe it’s time to remember that Halloween is about having fun for the night, not getting pedantic about the proper interpretation of a comic book character.

This story has EVERYTHING! His wife literally called with a flat tire!? AND HE DIDN’T GET THE IRONY!? I LOVE THIS! I’M ALL CAPPING BECAUSE I LOVE THIS SO MUCH!

(NB - Not my photo)

Hugs.

All I can say us to go into this with an open mind and no shame. The more honest you are, the more easy it will be for them to help you.

God, I feel so sorry for that grocery store’s employees. You know the last week (at least) of cleaning and making everything perfect for her visit has been fucking miserable.

Jeez, was that ever irritating when they all kept acting surprised that she admitted to engaging in sexual activities, like sexting, going to a nude beach, etc.

Kinda think it’s shitty how people are so negative about the KUWTK resuming filming after ~only 3 weeks.~ Because of course there is never a good way to be a victim and if she doesn’t hole up and hide away forever, fuck her that attention-seeking whore. And whatever you may think about the Kardashians, these kinds of…

Eat less, work out more, weigh less and still have saddlebags.

Everyone has gotten fired whether deserved or not-it happens. Take it as a rite of passage, for real. This is going to be hard but make a decision from a sound place, not one of fear and reaction. Do what makes sense for you in the long run. Our brains can only process so much but sit back and decide what’s best for…

by that logic, i’m exceptional at quitting smoking - i’ve done it a multitude of times.

YES YES YES YES. I look forward to this shit ALL YEAR. Not to downplay all the other funny and good Andy important things Jezebel publishes throughout the year, but spooky stories is your very greatest tradition.