His lawyer was included on that group text So under the Latin legal concept of ipso facto doofus delicti, that means he’s immune from being charged and has to get 16 targets each week from Tom Brady (who must now invite Brown to have dinner at Brady’s home once a week for life). The law works in mysterious ways.

I would bet all the money that AB’s thought process is “I’m gonna add my lawyer to this cnversation - now it’s attorney-client privledge.”

Ah, the fake kneel. That’s the move elderly or overweight Catholics do at church where they just scoot their ass a little closer to the edge of the pew so they don’t have to struggle to get back up.

I’m starting to think there’s something wrong with this guy. 

I've typed out like 6 different jokes but I can't bring myself to post any. This shit isn't funny. This fucker shouldn't be playing in the NFL right now making millions of dollars. He should be in jail or therapy or both. Fuck this guy.

I feel like so much of this could be solved if these people got the shit beat out of them just once in their younger years. Seriously. I really do. 

Forget it, Jake; it’s Florida Woman.

Any suggestions as to why Hager might have done this can be sent directly to me at jeromebettis24@aol.com.

Because degenerates out there are betting on Arizona high school sports, and against Mountain Pointe specifically, and he owes those degenerates money.

Given the user name, that seems on brand.

But what of the dudes in brown flip-flops??

WHY ISN’T THERE AN OPTION TO FLAG A COMMENT FOR RANK STUPIDITY?

I wonder when the Panthers will start that Nate kid. He’s been warming up for a long time.

My dad says it’s because he’s a quitter and only cares about collecting a paycheck instead of winning.

Barry Petchesky: I’ll take Catastrophic Jets Injuries for $30 million, Alex

My girlfriend’s sister had mono when we were all in college. I was terrified I’d get it because my girlfriend was the super jealous type and she would have accused me of kissing her sister or something. And the last thing I’d want is my girlfriend yelling at me because then my wife would find out.

I wonder how they could Justfy these actions. I would hope they get more than a Citation from the Secretariat responsible. This type of Assault on horse racing ethics cannot be Affirmed.

Well I neighver 

They already tried that at Santa Anita.

I don’t think it’s nearly as unusual as you believe it is, and you really ought to educate yourself some more on the psychology of victims before you spout off about what is “typical” or “highly unusual.”