Jesus Christ, I’m so tired of Americans being too stupid to understand when they’re contradicting themselves.

You are kind of stupid.

Well according to him, a weaker yuan is indeed bad and means they are a “currency manipulator.”

Thank you for staying laser focused on sports by breaking down his swing. I’d be upset if I was tricked into reading about international geopolitical events on Deadspin.

What might not suck: They opened a sensory room at Lincoln for for fans with autism and other sensory issues who need to take a break without having to exit the stadium. I know we are supposed to be dragging them but Swoop has headphones on and that’s fucking adorable.

do they have statues  honoring them?

I grew up outside of Philly and I hate the fucking Eagles, man.

Actually, isn’t the city’s biggest celebrity a fictional character from a movie?

And there’s something rotten in the crisper drawer, if you know what I mean.

I don’t need to open the door to know that guy’s light is not on.

Nobody star this.

he was right to edit you

Whoa whoa whoa, slow down there buddy! Nobody’s suggesting actual on-field results should matter at all in sports. That would be insane!

As a follow up because I really miss playing softball in my twenties, by far the worst thing was coming up with the bases loaded, hammering a line drive into a gap, and getting a single or a double because the guy in front of you runs a 21.24 40-yard dash.

Jesus. With hobbies like this, I bet this guy is an extra virgin.

No way does a storm trooper actually throw a pitch into the strike zone.

I mean, if you’re gonna unfurl a ‘Trump 2020’ flag somewhere, you might as well do it where the people there are so stupid they went to an Orioles game in August.

“I forget that his knee was hurt,” said head coach Kyle Shanahan.