If you imagine a very undercooked potato, you’re 92% there.

Today I Didn’t Learn: who Clay Travis is.

Sir, I too an utterly shocked and dismayed to find out that this gentleman, already reputed to be a notorious POS in his practice, would also be a POS in other aspects of his life...

I never would have expected this kind of behavior from a 76-year-old man who goes by “Bobby.”

About as fast as Tommy DiVito’s time as a made man.

Anthony Scaramucci is just an anagram for:

Impressive. I’ve already finished.

Impressive. I’m usually good for a few seconds.

Impressive. I’m usually good for a couple of minutes.

After calling an escort I frequently mention god for an hour or two.

Incidentally, that was a great comment. I wonder if he would like to share his opinions on the validity of shooting people who disagree with you in politics with his colleague, Steve Scalise.

That’s a low blow, attacking his lack of athletic physique.

SOMETIMES SNACKING IS A CHORE AND IT’S HARD WORK AND SOME OF US SWEAT BUT WE SNACK THROUGH THE DISCOMFORT BECAUSE SNACKING IS VERY VERY IMPORTANT.

Bless your heart.

Man, you guys, I think maybe the NFL has a racism problem.

You’ve really got to stop trying to fuck Cousins like that.

Pretty sure they’re not called dongs over there, they’re called knobs.

From the Globe story (my emphasis added):