Bitter expedients. Bitter cretin. Papa John.

It hurts because it’s true. So very, very true.

I think New York could use a 2nd professional team.

Fucken gaijin. 

White girls posting white savior pictures surrounded by a dozen children in Africa. Always thought these were really creepy and or at the very least, completely lacking self awareness.

Finally, someone managed a complete and total Brexit. 

As a hetero male, auto swipe-lefts include any of the following in a woman’s Tinder profile:

Or because men are no longer willing to become enslaved and lose their income and property through marriage.

Polonium-210 strikes again.

schadenfraud 

Steph Curry seems to get shorter every year.

Don’t!

“I also wish to thank the USMNT, which has provided crucial assistance in achieving my goal of not seeing anything American at this World Cup.”

Later that night they planned to burn a large wooden T on someone’s lawn. To let them know it was the Tennis team.

Can we not make this a thing please? Not even a thinkpiece type of thing? There’s no mystery here, and it doesn’t take investigative journalism to see this is clearly a small child being coached by overbearing stage parents to perform an annoying, badly Blaccented, not very clever character. This is cringeworthy at…

Here’s what playoff hockey in Montreal and Detroit looks like:

He wanted an even higher strikeout rate, but “Giancarlo Stanton” was already taken.

When magazines are writing extensive articles about every aspect of a celebrities life, it kind of makes sense.

“Yes, I’m taking notes.” - Bill Belichick

Well, maybe if you had put a little more effort into winning the Revolutionary War, this wouldn’t have happened, old chap.