Considering their target market is “dolts”, I think they’re right on brand.

Neutral: This seems aimed at the douchebag hustler that wants a Porsche to impress potential fraud victims and won’t even learn where the gas cap is on the car.  Porsche ownership involves a relationship with a mechanic, who is often yourself.

The “People’s Credit Card” has always been their supply of cheap (slave/child/prison) labor. The recent authoritarian crackdown is most likely an attempt to secure and/or renew that labor supply.

Neutral:

Michael Vick was/is a pathological liar who was leading a double life and lied directly to his boss’s face when confronted about it.  He definitely deserved to go to jail for his crimes, but what kind of fool offers that liar a contract again?  Two-time Father of the Year, Andy Reid.

That’s a Fantastiq idea!

And how could that dude NOT see her?  She has a freakin’ halo around her!

“California Emission” was the punchline to many a Johnny Carson smog-is-so-bad-in-LA joke in the 70's. The smog was real, and the multi-faceted approach to dealing with it over the decades actually did make a difference. However, Smog in LA jokes are still evergreen.

BMW owner + Gazebo = Gazeboner

Bet that reef is now expecting a chunk of the insurance payout. It’s a classic maritime scam.

...with a bent frame that makes it wiggle on launch. Dude doesn’t get enough credit for his driving skills.

We still don’t know if the 2021 model will strap on top of a clapped out Vette like the 2020 model can.

Would part of this education involve wearing a mask while driving in a car alone?

Stop it. You’re out of CTRL. I’ll Pause/Break while you Insert a Space joke at Home.

My understanding is that a century ago when cars were introduced to China, the word “Buick” received a very favorable translation that has resulted in it being the prestige brand there ever since.

Semantics, I guess. I would say some of those systems enhance the driver’s intentional actions rather than override them.  ACC and emergency braking are low risk overrides that are certainly worth it.

You’re doing great!  You’ve made positive changes in your life that are now allowing you to see some new challenges to overcome. Success begets success, and you are on a winning streak.

None of those venerable safety measures you mention take control of the vehicle away from the driver while in motion. They make the vehicle safer for the driver to operate or survive collisions. Removing throttle and steering control from the operator is dangerous at highway speeds.

Unprofessional?  You can always request a refund.

It’s a shame The Motorboating Sloths had to cancel this year’s “Two Fingers of Metal” tour.