Pro tip: add a “Fuck Fuck” to your contacts.

My mom’s family is spectrum-y (engineers) so we played cribbage. NOBODY knows how to play cribbage, and I can't do a victory dance when I flip a double-double run against my phone :(

I dunno, the body count of our military operations over the last decade is a hell of a lot higher than Russia’s, and we’ve shown we’re happy to get entangled in irresolvable conflicts with no compelling national security motivation. I'd bet he listens.

I agree. It looks like a squinting owl.

Is it wrong that I think those Kias are really good looking? I love that angle where the side and rear windowlines intersect.

I jus hope they’ve got plenty of money left over to repair those cars, after spending millions bribing FIFA. I guess they’ll have a bit saved from using slaves to build their empty skyscrapers and stadiums.

Nice pull! These have got to be some of the weirdest factory paint jobs ever.

I was not aware they made ANY with a manual -not a bad car, unless you're one of the jaguar devotees who insist on spending your children's college fund at the shop.

Those are so beautiful. Was the GXP stuck with the truck transmission or did it get a proper manual?

I adore these, and I have literally no idea why. But a red one is in my dream garage. (White interior, naturally.)

Wait, THAT’S the house? Fuck the stupid car, I want THAT.

Ok sure, the Ghost is better looking than the Phantom, but it's like judging a beauty contest in a burn ward.

Gah, it’s just so TERRIBLE. I’m sure everything fits with a micron of tolerance and the leather smells of a patrician grandmother and Rolls Royce will inlay endangered beetle carapaces into the dashboard on request, but it’s got the grace and lines of a faux-deco apartment complex, although the car may weigh slightly…

I think people PERCEIVE Volkswagen as a quality brand, thanks to really great advertising. Car people know they’re mostly unreliable and overpriced.

Hip-hop and R&B artists talk about cars all the time, from throw-away mentions to entire tracks that are basically lists of mods. But old, wealthy white men have not heard this music, ergo WaPo is unaware it exists.

We need a word for that kind of second-wave moralizing. I nominate “matronizing.”

He could NOT have killed two people in two seconds “just as easily” with a knife... Unless he was a fucking samurai he couldn’t have even done it with a sword. You can maybe outrun a dude swinging a bat or a knife. You'll never outrun a bullet.

I don’t think we pay as much attention to those as we used to.

You think we’re going to sell them bullets?

Chattel Slavery. Unauthorized civilian possession of nuclear materials. And I don't think you can get quaaludes anymore...