Gotta give it to him on the technique. Uses canine teeth to puncture can to avoid fumbling with car keys, assumes proper stance as to not spill beer down jersey, pops top, drops left hand covered in beer to avoid dripping beer down the arm, crushes can for maximum flow. 5 seconds flat from catch and release.

Marky Mark botched the job.

I have to say, as a non-Yankee fan, this systematic destruction of Jeter’s carefully crafted public image - largely at his own hands - pleases me greatly.

You want to talk about Cheating? It's a breast stroke competition and all the chicks were using their hands! 

I get what you’re saying, but you’re tuning in for a specific, controlled kind of violence. You aren’t tuning in to see someone’s eyes get gouged or their ear bitten off. So when something happens that is outside of the violence that the sport generally produces, it’s jarring. I know that this slam is technically withi…

Red stripey things on the outside of the ball + spinny spin spin + air = dancing ball

Jax is a town that would absolutely lose its mind if Kaep came here. There are 2 Navy bases here, and the military makes up a huge percentage of the populace. It’s also the deep South (more southern Georgia than Florida), so the God/Guns/Flag crew are very strong here. Note I’m all for Kaep and his mission, but this…

This stat from Jordan Bastian is a week old, but still very fun:

I have to say, despite UCF being #1 in the Deadspin 25 this year and last year and the year before that, the coverage of this team here has been piss-poor.

This is one of the dumbest things I have ever read.

Better idea:

Not to break the poignancy of the moment, but...it’s not like they’ve given you a lot of options.....

Don’t hold your breath. He very clearly states that anything done to steer resources away from the government is racist, because only the government can fix your problems if you are black. Not you, not your family, not your community, the government. Meanwhile, they do everything they can to discredit and demonize the…

I think this is what people mean when they say “deceptive speed”.

Elkington: I will publicly guess the size of your paycheck.

No, the basketball PLAYERS were good. If all we wanted to watch was a glorified skills contest in an uncompetitive vacuum, then I might actually tune into All-Star game weekend for the first time ever.

“We need a pitcher! Not an asshole sniffer!”

Björnsson filed an official appeal requesting that footage of his final rep be reviewed, but it was denied.

I’m pretty positive he was going to throw it at Strickland but thought better of it at the last second.

I started off looking for a joke, then became completely absorbed. Very well done, Barry, with a very complicated topic. I know this field fairly well, and you nailed all the details. +1