Intolerance is one thing. Maybe you puke, maybe you have explosive poop.

He told me I’d never be a writer. I became a writer. Got published.

Goddamned Blaire. Fuck him.

Long distance relationship. Found out he had moved in with his ex wife. Hacked his FB and saw that he’d been talking to an assload of other women online (met a few of them—including my friend from grade school).

Lucien Greaves

At least we don’t see the blurry frame on each side. I want to punch the motherfucker who invented that.

That’s a damn good idea.

Who the fuck are these assholes telling parents what their kids should/should not put in their lunches? I have a child in grade school and I cannot fathom receiving a letter or email that explains exactly how many fruits/vegetables I need to include in my kid’s lunch.

I don't know who Brock Wilbur is, but I want to have his baby. INSIDE a Hot Topic.

“My favorite though, was when I overheard a new employee who was prepping cucumbers and talking to the dish washer. She thought it was really dishonest that we said some of our sandwiches were vegetarian or vegan when they contained cucumber. The dishwasher was confused and said that cucumbers were vegetables. The…

Nothing like imagining a bunch of 60-year-old cougars pawing at douchey male servers who look like walking herpes.

Fail at everything. Turn in your person badge. Thx.

7th grade - 1983. Scared the hell out of me. Some gorgeous, popular guy said I had a “fine ass,” then when I turned around to look at him, he cringed and told me I was “the ugliest person he’d ever seen.”

What the holy fuck. Is this a real face?

I have a little joy leftover. Can you suck it out of me, please? It’s Monday. I Need to move from “dragging” to “suicidal” and you're the only one that can help me. Thx

Why would you lump the death of Gilbert Blythe in this mixture of shittery? Just fuckin’ awful. Thanks.

Actually rooting for Christian Bale on this one.

As you said, it’s not going away anytime soon in some states. So, yeah, I definitely advocate for it being as painless as possible.