Should’ve gone with
Star Trek + Showtime (and stuff)

If she did that my eyeballs might catch fire.

A crummy commercial? Sonofabitch!

I can only hope that Twitter finally fails as a company in his hands.

What a disgusting fucking bastard. 

That cover photo makes me really want Joaquin Phoenix in a Gargamel origin story

Blue Felt

Half Life 3 confirmed!

I’ve seen that scene so many times now that the “great ass” part isn’t even the part that makes me laugh anymore. It’s when he finishes with the “And you got yo’ head... ALLA WAY UP IN IT!” and then he gives Azaria this look:

Narrator: She was not, in fact, cake.

With the added bonus that plenty of those other writers and content creators actually, well, finish the story. 

Yeah, I’ve got this crazy thing called a “sense of narrative completion” and I really like it and want it in my reading material.

“... when there’s so much other content they could be getting excited for.”

You could say the episode is....PRETTY NICE.

Is it possible to have ONE interesting or positive news story that ISNT steeped in cynicism or reminders of our doom?

May 19th, 1999, ~2AM: Lined up for hours to see a midnight showing of The Phantom Menace. Thought the movie was terrible — the only one of my friends enjoying it was always-too-stoned guy.

I saw The Blair Witch Project in the theater, and while the scares depended on how much you bought into the premise, they were accelerated when we too experienced a power outage and everything came to a screeching halt halfway through the movie

*rightfully calls Clapton mediocre

Lord Of The Rings: The Beginning of the Ent.

This is a fine solution to having to actually carry a large book around (for which they make bookbags and backpacks), as long as you don’t care that once you are done with the book no one else will ever want to use it and so you might as well immediately throw it into the garbage. Or recycle it, if you’re not too…