In most jobs that’s called “unsatisfactory performance” and you get fired for it.

I imagine that if you’re merely wealthy, the Four Seasons is the better experience than some random house. But if you’re Beyoncé wealthy, it would make sense to buy a house that you can modify to suit your every last whim, and fill it with your staff.

It looks like it falls right into the whole Tumblr-sticker aesthetic. The skin art equivalent of maintaining a loosely tied-together visual theme of otherwise unrelated concepts, but in a more minimal way than a traditional sleeve does.

Is it just me or have there been a lot of “positive press” stories about Amy Schumer lately? First the mattress thing and now this? Not to get all conspiracy theory, but I feel like it’s a response to the negative audience reviews she’s been getting for her latest Netflix special.

She’s had her moments here and there. I thought she was pretty natural and good in Contagion— then again, her character there was basically “rich lady having fun.”

I’m sure Wintour is crying into a handkerchief made out of spun gold that you’re not attending her party.

There’s a calculated neutrality to the grey tee that creeps me out. Like I get the idea behind “singular uniforms” like Jobs’ black turtleneck and Karl Lagerfeld’s black suit and gloves— kind of goofy but at the same time, the aesthetic reveals something about their personalities and outlook as people.

A Beyoncé in a room full of Michelles

I don’t love repeating myself, but what makes it acceptable is permission.

I mean, if these fans are not creative enough to make their own ‘spiritual successor,’ and are simultaneously dumb enough to use a company’s intellectual property without permission to release an unapproved game without covering their tracks, then.... yes, fuck ‘em.

The creatures were referred to as Pokemon that you caught with Pokeballs, you were getting gym badges, the types were the same except for Nuclear... Nobody would reasonably think of it as “its own dang thing.” It was a Pokemon game with an officially-unapproved storyline and a different skin, full stop.

Judge Brown’s rulings are impeccable as always, but completely off-topic, HOW are Michelle Obama’s arms and hands so gorgeous? Those nails and wrists are breathtaking. Random, I know.

Didn’t Margaret Atwood say at one point that more or less everything happening in the book is something that has actually happened in an organized way to women, somewhere in the world?

I don’t think learning and hopefully evolving from a prior view is particularly confusing. Let’s hope she sticks with it.

I’m so tired of these “old man cheats on his wife with hot young thing” stories. So tired. Partly because I feel it’s an eternal corollary of monogamy, and these trash men will be causing heartbreak until the end of time. It. Will. Never. Stop.

To be fair, Serena is undeniably a lot more famous than Alex so it’s not even that shady.

I feel like Katy is trying to be hip and mimic that whole “Gordon Ramsay roasting people on Twitter” thing, but as usual she just does the most and comes off like an uncool aunt.

A lot of these aren’t even *that* weird as far as mixing flavors goes. When you get right down to it, “real” cooking is just pairing sweet, salty, sour, and bitter with more traditionally accepted ingredient pairings.

“He predicted incorrectly”— if there’s a 30+% chance of rain, I’m bringing my umbrella. It’s called probability.

I have Milo (aka food of the gods if you grew up in any former British colony) and now I’m gonna make myself a tall, cold glass of Milo dinosaur.