You know the Kia is a better car than the Land Rover, right?

We are all assholes. Don't sweat it.

No room for even the egg carton. Maybe wait until you need the egg to take it out of the refrigerator?

He'll save money on shirts.

If you’re going to mince it, you already have the cutting board and knife out.

Fields struck a plea deal with federal prosecutors to take the death penalty off of the table

If they’re poor they do.

Fahrenheit is more precise over the temperature range people typically experience.

When I get a friend request, I look at their posts before I accept. If it’s nothing but reposts from other sites and no original content, I decline. I am not interested in spam.

I want to scream when my in-laws do this (I’m the one paying, natch). Who the fuck raised you barbarians? You picked at your filet and ignored the roasted zucchini, but you’d like the creme brulee? These are the same idiots who ask if anyone wants an appetizer, everyone says no, so they order one and eat only a small…

There’s a bit of timing that an attentive human being can get right. Not too soon, not too late.

Dog owners.

Oh, you’re right of course.

The one with the better social skills.

Web traffic is the product.

Either bad Bill Russell or good John Valby.

Geographic majority. That’s a pretty weird concept.

That’s nothing. I’m going to tell him that Puerto Ricans are US citizens.

The Me Generation are those who came into adulthood in the 1970s. So yeah, they’re older folks.

But it’s a manufacturer’s coupon and I’ll get double off since it’s less than $1. Like it’s my fucking fault that the manager doesn’t trust Betty to override the register, so she has to call Kevin over to do it for her. If I knew ahead of time that my Sparkle coupon would cause such a fuss, I would have grabbed the…