Lamb fries?!?

The shrimp thing is ironic, because without formaldehyde shrimp (or restaurant customers) may not even have existed in the first place.

Nobody is really sure...

Not a single mention of Guy Fieri?

D'ough!

Products get renamed from something accurate but unappealing-sounding...to a complete nonsense name that sounds better

Our Fryer who chars in Heaven
Tallow be thy name

And open a Home Depot right there in the church.

The planet Venus has atmosphere, but I wouldn't stay for it. Especially not if it had been franchised.

Is ginger ale "food" or "violence"? Are those my only choices? Because half the time I go to the grocery it's just to get more ginger ale.

"Federal Agents eat whale meat and blubber. You would too if you had to eat whale meat."

Mayonnasal

I would much rather eat fake mayonnaise that is named after a sinus medication.

Sub-conjunctival hemorrhage?

I'm glad I invested in RAMJAC while it was still a penny stock.

We'll finally get to try his pizza!

I especially like the Penguin Asada.

We'll need to get that down under 2% to be in full compliance with the law.

"A nutty mushroom flavor, followed by puke."

"Try our delicious vinegaroons"