Thank you for making me spit water onto my keyboard. I’m going to pass that line along to the wife—I’m sure she’ll make good use of it. Where do I send the royalty check?

I almost choked on my popcorn. It’s like the boob version of the manic smile when dudes say “smile.” I love it.

Marry me

I am loving you so much right now.

That is fucking hilarious and absolutely the best way to deal with this kind of situation.

Well, hello there!

what you doing after work? <winks>

Cameo in the Wonder Woman film? Come on, that would be awesome.

Part of me hopes they’ll just spend the next 10 years on the beach in Maui, because god knows they deserve it.

Michele Obama wins everything. I’m so excited to see what she will do next!!!

Was it just me, or did she look/sound a little emotional when she said the line about her daughters being able to take for granted that a woman could be president? I don’t know why, but I wasn’t expecting that from her. Not because I don’t think Michelle would care about big milestones in women’s achievement, but just…

This movie was at 11:50am on a Saturday. If you wish to avoid children at the movie theatre, a weekend matinee might not be the best time to attend.

“It’s the biggest night of the year for these dolts and I don’t think it’s out of the realm of reason to expect people to not wear jeans.”

It’s not out of the realm of reason at all. Jeans are for children, or adults doing manual labor. If you’re not planting a garden or hanging drywall, buy some grown-up clothes.

(I’ve…

I’m with you. My wife and I may be old fashioned. We still try to dress nice when we go to the Dr. or fly in a plane as well.

According to Playmate of the Year Dani Mathers, it is scientifically possible to “accidentally” body-shame a woman on Snapchat. I’m waiting for Neil deGrasse Tyson’s Twitter dad take on it with bated breath.

It’s amazing to hear any celebrity name the struggle, even more when its one of the only queer black women with tangible celebrity. Queen Latifah has been an under-appreciated force for queer women 0f color, even as many have rightfully critiqued her for remaining silent as certain times.

You can get ’em at DSW for half that! http://www.dsw.com/shoe/nine+west…

You can get ’em at DSW for half that! http://www.dsw.com/shoe/nine+west…

My go-to work shoe is the Nine West Rocha in nude or black (but not the patent leather version, that one is evilly tight) and it’s over budget bc they’re $125 new but you can get them basically new on eBay for under $100.

My go-to work shoe is the Nine West Rocha in nude or black (but not the patent leather version, that one is evilly…

This effort will be no less than a sea change and a jackhammer to the foundations this country was built on. It’s going to take sustained, organized, and unrelenting action. I don’t know how to do it, but for those far smarter than me and who have lived lives in fear and humiliation due to their skin color, you lead…

I’m about to head to the Governor’s mansion in a minute. My daughter sent me a text today, “Mom, I love you. I’m so scared.”