If she does this amazing book justice on screen I will forgive every other shit thing she has done.

God, she sucks.

I dont understand the whole Muslim 72 virgins thing.

Is that counting invalids with dead remote control batteries and seniors who died with the TV on?

More like halfheartedly rearranging shit while muttering "Thanks for making me miss my bus, asshole".

Another way to feel good without actually making an effort.

Settle down crybabies, take solace in the fact that soccer is not a real sport.

And when I try to give my beer soaked balls to a young girl they lock me up.

There's a brand new thing on the market called "hookers".

Jesus Fucking Christ dude, just swallow a fucking bullet.

Uh, or maybe you could just eat because if god exists im sure he does not give a flying fuck either way.

Yay! Porn is awesome and liberating for women!

Kill yourself.

If you had to have sex with your mom ONCE or wear one Rollerblade for the rest of your life which would you choose??

To be fair they are some pretty stupid motherfuckers.

Wow, sorry you fucking millionaire.

Likes it in the dumper.

Kids today dance like dick heads.