Yeah there are a few typos too. (See last two sentences of the paragraph that starts with "I agree with Hitchens"). Wouldn't want your point to be belittled by the small stuff.

Oh my god, this made you cry? I am so sorry! I definitely didn't realize that this story would make people so sad.

This is silly. Everyone knows there are MUCH easier ways to purchase children.

Wow that is really creepy and sorry you had such an awful childhood. A message from someone like that would scare the shit out of me too!

That's a really good story!

That is freaky as shit!

My grandmother, Granny we called her, was an amazing woman. She raised 11 children and had 20-something grandchildren and two great grandchildren. She was incredibly loved by everyone, including me. We had a very close relationship and spoke on the phone often. I’d visit her at her Russian River home and eventually…

Yeah. I (unfortunately) looked at the Etsy account. Good news! It can be yours for only $12.99.

I wish I knew. Oh wait...no I don't.

I wish I knew. Oh wait...no I don't.

Nothing gets me hotter than a guy who sports a "'Wearing My Mothers Panties On My Tongue" t-shirt.

Mini rant: I've had my Goblin King costume finished for months now (yes I am psycho about Halloween) and now that family photo has blown up on the interwebs and effed me over. Now every ass hat is going to think I copied that photo. Damn you adorably creative family! [end of rant]

I blame Pinterest for the 6 weddings I went to this year that featured chalkboard, hydrangeas, burlap, and mason jars.

Yeah I stopped buying costumes from these stores years ago, mostly because they are boring/uncreative but also because I am a god damn adult and my can-eat-at-McDonalds-3-days-a-week-and-still-be-115lbs days are way behind me. What has always impressed me is the girls who make their own costumes and find a way to make…

This display is crap, everyone knows that baby intestines taste TERRIBLE on tacos.

Because living 10 miles south of San Francisco is nothing like living in San Francisco.

Yeah she seems like she is trying too hard to convince everyone on that she is a woman...

The entire concept of an unpaid internship is mind bottling to me (you know, what happens when your thoughts get all trapped up like in a bottle). The only people who can afford to work for free are the kind of people who have their parents financially funding their coke addictions and Chanel purse collections.

My name's Little Cletus and I'm here to tell you a few things about child labor laws, ok? They're silly and outdated. Why back in the 30s, children as young as five could work as they pleased; from textile factories to iron smelts. Yippee! Hurray!