Many believe we should destroy the chicken before it destroys us. I believe that I should get the chicken to fall in love with me so that when it topples civilization, I will be there to pick up the pieces and rebuild the world in my image after I outlive the big chicken because my assumption is that chickens, no…

That not a man, its a chicken boo

I fear that this amazing team-effort by Michigan post-plane crash will give Jim Harbaugh terrible, terrible ideas for team building.

Michigan began seriously cutting into the deficit with 15 minutes to go

Agreed. But their seeding wasn’t as bad as Wisconsin, which is legitimately one of the 20 best teams in the country but got an 8 seed.

Michigan has now won 12 of 14. I said it before. They deserved better than a 7 seed. I know the big 10 wasn’t the strongest this year but a major conference team red hot that wins the conference tournament deserves more respect.

From Fab 5 to Fab thigh?

I’m sure Pitino will drown out his sorrows in a local Louisville prostitute.

Another premature exit for Pitino.

If it is funny, yet you do not know it’s funny, it is simultaneously both funny and not funny at the same time...

A colonoscopy is the only screening test that can actually prevent cancer. 

Also see: Pap Smears. Both are unpleasant but a hell of a lot less unpleasant than getting cancer.

This is what happens when you focus too much on RPI and not enough on the sniff test.

Yep, the top photo is basically the parking area; if you’re standing where that photo was taken, the driveway hooks to the left downhill ... for fucking forever.

Reading is fundamental. here’s four references to Vicodin on just one page. There are dozens more.

But Josh Gordon is gonna have his career ruined because of weed.

the best part about the cleveland browns is we all eventually die

The other batsman was Hope, as in, I Hope that doesn’t happen to me.

Because he strung some words together that could maybe kinda be construed as a joke, but mostly just seems like a stupid insult of a sports team, Matheny is being sued for impersonation by the Deadspin comments.

This is an NFL story. What’s a union?