Because a lot of steak is fried, in pan. Chicken fried denotes breaded and deep fried, like fried chicken.

I've given up trying to tell people how to order cost effectively. They get confused and then they feel cheated, like they haven't really gotten what they wanted. "Oh, you'd like a tostada with nothing BUT beans and guacamole AND you'd like to pay $9 for it when if you ordered them separately it would be less than $3?…

Because "chicken fried" means it's breaded and fried like what you would picture for fried chicken. If I heard "fried steak" I would just think it was fried in a pan, not breaded like fried chicken.

It's not actually caesar dressing if it doesn't have anchovies in it.

Oh my god, yes. I worked in a bookstore, but same thing. "I can't find the price on this; is it free?" Because YEAH, YOU GOT ME, THAT'S EXACTLY HOW COMMERCE WORKS. Once—just once in 5 years!—I snapped, and actually said "I have never heard that funny joke before!" to the guy, and he was so astounded he made his…

One of the great culinary lessons my father taught me: The making of "cocktail sauce". Another one was Thousand Island dressing, which we made using our homemade meat relish, mayo and ketchup. Dad was also the person who told me what McDonald's Big Mac "secret sauce" truly was.

but, but Caesar dressing NEEDS anchovies to be any good.

Fresh sardines are yummy! As are fresh anchovies! particularly deep fried. I have only had them served like that in Spain, so I know they're yummy and fresh the way they do 'em, not stinky and crammed into a tiny can.

You would think, right? Again, playing dumb and ignorant (always happy and appreciative, never defensive) seemed to diffuse most people. "thanks! I've never seen that before." The worst people were the ones who had the name of the drink only, but didn't know what was in it. (for the uncommon drinks, not the…

It's the funniest joke every though, right...?

Most likely fresh sardines. "Sardine" doesn't refer to any species of fish, it's more about size. They can be brisling, smelt, or (I think) small herring.

I once had a customer ask why the sweetbreads were listed under the entree section on the menu as opposed to the dessert section. Horrified, but not displaying the horror, I asked if maybe he meant "sweetmeats". He said yes, then asked what sweetbreads were. I told him what they were, and how they were prepared. He…

Oh fuck. I worked retail in an industry in which many customers were waaaayyyy too comfortable with us because, I suppose we shared a hobby (except it was my profession) and therefore must've just been two peas in a pod. I was shocked on multiple occasions by the absolutely offensive shit people thought was okay to…

Oiks. People always think they are so freaking clever.

I found that playing dumb and making them explain the logic a great way to respond. It worked different ways. When I tended bar, guests would be shocked that I was unaware of the special drink that you ordered from the other guy that one time. "Someday I'll know ALL THE DRINKS!"

I once had a woman order steak tartar, well-done. I explained that the dish was extremely high end beef, hand minced, served raw...to her horror, and her husband's great confusion. Just to be a dick I said, Think of it as cow sushi. They were not amused.

when I was a little kid I ordered the shrimp boat while out with my parents. I was so excited. A shrimp boat all to myself. I had plans with that boat. It would sail across the seas in that boat. Imagine my disappointment when it was just a lot of shrimp. Of course I was like 7 at the time.

If you aren't going to take 45 seconds to read her wikipedia to see that she's more than someone's daughter, you shouldn't comment.

I am a very recent (in the past two weeks) fan after watching her show Candidly Nicole.

At this point, he began angrily shaking a bottle of ketchup, dumped it all over his once-beautiful porterhouse