I know what you mean but… Character! Atmosphere! Development!

Your 'probation officer' I suppose could be called a 'guidance counselor'.

I bet you were the wheedling informant whom Berenger had to slap some respect into. Nickname: 'Wormy'. Catchphrase: "It wasn't us! It was The Warriors!"

Ours did. But it was a rather expensive prep school. I imagine you went to one of those sinkhole concrete blocks where Edward James Elmos teaches you that Hamlet is just like rap.

Hey, an crazy old biddy is fighting an orangutan. What more do I need to know?

I don't know what that means. Is that a thing?

Are you kidding? He writes like a fifteen year old school magazine gossip columnist who hasn't quite come out yet. This is what Perez Hilton was like before he 'matured'. It's no accident 'Starwipe' collapsed in an unfunny heap of failure.

That Shitpants?

Yeah, I couldn't quite make out what that was. Some kind of 'corporate malfeasance'?

Oh come one, everyone knows that a Littlefinger assassin kills [REDACTED] the drunken dwarf aristocrat in the second episode of next season by now.

Jesus, now they're sacking people for dirty jokes made ten years ago.

You're obviously too poor to travel.

Political poster:

Two New York Jewish kids? From the 1970s? With a Michalangelo cartoon? He's prolly doing time as an accomplice for Bernie Madoff having creamed off $200 million while she's funded her own chair at Brandeis in Cross-Gender Hermaneutics In Late 20th Century Capitalist Patriarchies.

I only ever read The Mixed Up Files. I usually, as a child, found those kind of 'reality' children's stories to be prosy and worthy but this one, so I remember, was excellent. I believe that they made a film of it with Ingrid Bergman. It might have been good.

Well, it's not much of a world outside it, is it?

Maybe they have their own dragon.

So this is goodbye then.

I certainly hoped that old bag left them a couple of mil. What else was she going to do with it?

Yes, yes. Jolly good.