I felt bad for all of the Britney fans on the internet talking about how great Brit Brit was.... ummmmm... really? Cause this Beyonce girl can sing and dance and make amazing art at the same time... for 15 minutes straight... while your girl Brit just lip-syncs and kind of jiggles her ass.... I’m not a fangirl by any…

Can we stop using “pussy” as a word to mean weak though? My vagina has birthed three god damn kids.

So the orange one will be debating foreign policy with a former Secretary of State who’s travelled to most of the countries of the planet and knows where they’re located on a map. Innnnnteresting.

It's sad how shocked I am that an Asian woman has ever won an academy award.

Meanwhile, in Canada, our new Defense Minister is sworn in;

And it’s also kind of infamous as a Mecca for racist white South Africans who post 1994 left South Africa because they ‘don’t wanna be ruled bahhyy bleddy blecks!’ and sit patiently, feverishly hoping for the demise of South Africa to prove them right. The hot weather, casual racism, barbeques(braais) and rugby makes…

Except if you read the article, you’ll see that there was indeed actual slavery in Australia...a fact I believe many modern Australians and Americans would also find surprising (or a secret, as it were). Preferring to call it “indentured servitude” doesn’t mean that it was not actually slavery.

don’t forget...

Remember kids: Black Lives Matter is a bunch of whiners who are looking for reasons to be offended. The real oppression is a lack of Christmas iconography on your coffee cups.