@TheK-GunNeedsReloaded: NO SPOILERS I'M STILL STUCK AT WORK

Is this where I go to laugh at Chelsea?

@Corncob: It was actually the mysterious "Hermano"

I miss the days of the Poulan Weedeater Independence Bowl, and the least crucial bowl game ever, the [Crucial.com] Humanitarian Bowl.

Hope she has better lawyers than last time, sounds like this will require some creative legal tapdancing by the attorneys.

@Steve_U: Also, who knew that "Nikolai Valuev" actually means "paper champion" in Russian? Amazing concidence.

Is it too much to ask for the Falcons to trade Jamaal Fudge to Green Bay?

@Chuckie Hacks 2 and 0: Not necessarily, but it would be way more Bears-like to win tomorrow and then lose by two touchdowns in their final game.

Enjoy rooting for the Packers tomorrow, Vikings fans.

That's Matta with an A, not Motta with a Dick.

A friend of mine went to prom with Erin Andrews.

@Dan Daoust: The projection will be "sure, stick around". So they can reap the benefits of your high billing rate for another year or two regardless of whether they intend to make you a partner.

@Natrone Means Business: Hey now, recent MSU wide receivers might have weed-smoked their way out of the league or shot themselves in the leg, but they haven't killed anybody. Yet.

Next up: All Your Base Are Belong To Us Baseball Stadium.

@Afino: No, but he'll be fired with it.

@Boom! Turducken!: Different birds, same whining.

Hey Buzzsaw - that sound you hear is the approximately 10 million people in the Chicago metro area all flipping you the bird for this joke of a performance.

ARGH BUZZSAW

Dammit Buzzsaw, I need you guys to show up today. What the hell was that?

@Shakεy: Gus is going to do basketball games for the Big Ten Network. I want to see him attempt to make a Northwestern/Iowa game seem exciting.