I still haven’t watched “Crash”.

I still haven’t watched “Crash”.

I’m running behind, I suppose. 

It started with “THE PARLOR” and it was all downhill from there.

Is...is that a giant portrait of HIMSELF in THE PARLOR?

(Okay, to be honest, I do want that “couch” in the worst fucking way.)

Yeah, feminism and Nursing Nazis be damned, I don’t want a stranger’s breastmilk on me.

You shouldn’t be shamed for being squicked out by that. 

I’m....kinda on the side of the guy. WTF.

August 30, 1997*. Bus stop in Memphis, next to the Peabody Hotel. Crowded area. Dude was even using a porn magazine to “help”. Made direct eye contact with my poor mom, before it registered with her what he was doing. He finished just in time for the bus.

*The date was specific, because we went back to the hotel later…

My friend’s baby loved carrot, sweet potato, and squash baby food. LOVED it. So, it was all my friend fed her for like, a month.

Kid turned orange. Even her EARWAX was bright orange. 

I remember ordering a bottle of self tanner from the Avon book when I was in high school in the late 1980's. As a lifelong pasty ginger-ish girl who would get a sunburn if I spent too long in fluorescent lighting, whilst living in the Age of the Laying Out (in the south, no less), I nearly wept with joy.

Then that…

My star is actually a heart, and there are many. 

I’ve watched The Simpsons. This happened to Maggie, and there were FOUR bears.

I believe the toddler.

Oh, he is STILL a cash cow. That’s just it...something like this, the milk could dry up VERY quickly.

Millions in royalties, still. But the number of family members benefiting from that money x The lifestyle they have all become accustomed to = They need to make sure nothing affects that cash flow, even posthumously. 

“War of the Roses”.

I quote that shit weekly. 

I watched that movie a BILLION times, in the theater, when I was in middle school.

I watched it again about a year ago....yep, it’s still good. 

I was willing to give her some benefit of my doubt...having made bad decisions and been “stuck” in a toxic marriage for complex reasons once myself, I was slightly empathetic.

UNTIL THAT JACKET. Seriously, WTF, woman.

Our kitty is a lovely solid grey catto, which my daughter christened Pigeon. After we had her home from the shelter for a few days, I, never having experienced a grey catto before, was delighted to discovered that her toe-beans were PURPLE. I actually screamed.

I call her Princess Pigeon Silverfoot Grape Toes, First of…

Yup! Met her when she was 12. “Dated” her at 15. Married her at 16, because she was pregnant. And left her, with a 4 year old daughter, at 20 to hook up with Milla Jovovich.

Eugenie’s wedding is coming up...you KNOW Fergie is all over that shit and if there is a God it will be so gloriously tacky...

Prince Philip hates Fergie so much that he probably will not be attending. 

It’s been several years since I read that book...I seem to recall something about someone’s mom making really good bread by throwing nuts and berries and other stuff in it, and she’s making a financial killing at it...then she loses her mind and starts peeing in the dough and the colonial villagers got really upset?

Be…

Former paramedic, now a paralegal: Yes, they are required to treat and transport anyone who asks. If a patient is in a condition wherein they cannot communicate or are obviously confused/impaired, then EMS has implied consent that the patient would want for them to do everything possible to help. You are obligated to…

Former paramedic: We were a smaller service, and we also did some of the coding/billing. We knew how much the run was, how the different types of insurance worked, etc., but it literally NEVER was used as a reason to deny service, ever.

The closest we would get to discussing finances on scene was when a patient was…