YOU HAD ME AT TREK MEX.

So what you're saying is ...

Oh come on, don't act like bread soaked in bacon grease wouldn't be amazing (in moderation).

That moment when the boy lurches over and starts walking on all fours feels like watching one of those cavemen turning into a man posters. Only live. And in reverse.

the fact that you're empathetic enough to notice that the cat is scared and smart enough to give her some space makes you a better cat parent than many, many people. I work in a shelter and I can't tell you how many people bring their cats in because it was hiding under te bed and when the adults sent the school aged…

Clearly yes, because now I have to know where he went!

My Thursday started with a sore throat, which was concerning since the day before I'd been cleaning out a barn with lots of mice poo and pee. It's morphed into a headache, clammy forehead, and achy body. I'm hoping it's just a regular cold and not hantavirus. I'm sure I'll be fine in a few days. I think it'd be super…

My curiosity was insatiable.

A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished…

This reminds me of the time my high school's administrators made a big deal of checking the students' lockers for drugs. They brought a few cops and dogs along to search our lockers while we were in class. The only place they found anything was in one of the teacher's cars as they were leaving school premises.

You may not open the door to the room where I keep the taxidermied bodies of my previous partners

That's a relationship that wasn't even strong enough to handle monogamy, much less any kind of poly. The Boyfriend Contract, brought to you by Sheldon Cooper. Terrible. Glad your friend tore it up and ran.

I'd dump anyone who thought the only one who should have to follow rules in an open hetero relationship is the woman.

That contract takes all the open out of an open relationship.

Open relationship?

Open relationship? No. This is the contract of *EDIT* possessiveness and jealousy.

Because if she gets rid of a pregnancy then than means that a woman is being allowed to enjoy "consequence-free" sexual activity and that makes baby Jesus cry. PUNISH THE WOMEN FOR BEING SLUTS!!

I totally asked my boyfriend if we could be the "Potters'" or "Bagginses" but he didn't share my enthusiasm about it.

Exactly— this is a business transaction, not your personal excuse to work out your social hangups. If I want my wedding invitations to say "YO BITCHES WE GETTIN HITCHED SO COME ON DOWN AND GET PLASTERED!", that is what you will print on my invitations. If I want to address my bridesmaid's envelope to Grand High Lady…

I worked in event planning a bit - if a vendor EVER did that shit, they would NOT be paid/I would demand a reimbursement. Plain and simple. Especially if she has it in writing that she sent over the Excel sheet and asked that the names be transcribed as written. That means that the stationer did not do their job.

They should get him a kiddie pool and fill it with mint sauce.