I’m the same way. I’ve got a shock-proof, dust-proof, water-resistant flip phone with a decent camera, a calculator, and a calendar. Honestly what more do I need?

Haha thanks. I’m tired of people techsplaining to me why my life is made better by all this bullshit, but I’m just too stupid to understand why or how.

Sigh. Society doesn’t work.

TIL that IT professionals invented the pipe wrench.

Yes. Yes it is. These people are traitors.

No, I’m browsing Jezebel from a typewriter, genius

“You’re just jealous.” LOL.

Because I know my limitations.

Don’t forget oven mitts. Wouldn’t want to burn those soft useless hands.

Ain’t the 21st century great? Thanks Silicon Valley! All this shit has absolutely made our lives better, yes indeed. Now some foreign agent adept with a bit of code could knock out whole swathes of the electrical grid. Gotta love it.

What needs to be done, baby! I didn’t realize this was the Spanish Inquisition when I started commenting this evening

My car’s computer is simpler than a pocket calculator. It’s simple enough that all I have to do is know how to fix anything mechanical that breaks. And because I know how to work with my hands, I can do that.

Yeah, I know how to use a hammer drill and a torque wrench, too. And a stud finder. And a garden hoe. And a digital micrometer. And a shovel. And a pickaxe. And a nine-pound sledgehammer.

You and I have a very different idea of actual work. You know who’s doing actual work? Plumbers, electricians, and shop techs. Everything else is bougie window dressing. Eat me.

Had to look that up, but yes, death to unicorns. They contribute nothing of value to society and that is not hyperbole.

Oh PLEASE let there be a tech bubble burst. I would love nothing more than for those snide, vapid, useless motherfuckers in Silicon Valley to have to do actual fucking work for money.

Yes! You’re so smart *pat pat*

Maybe if you cry harder, things will go better. It’s worth a try.

Well shit, I’ll full-throatedly endorse hucking shit at motorcades.