I was hoping for this

“This is an incredible limo. It’s bulletproof—you can’t destroy it. So when I talk to even people from the other side, they’re trying to order our limo. They like the fact that you can’t destroy it it. I said, “How would it do in battle with your limo?” They say, “Well we have one problem—we can’t destroy your limo.”…

I didn’t understand a fucking word of that - but am still very impressed. 

I’m taking this news rather hard. Even with stiff competition from the Internet, I never thought this day would come.

Just wanted to leave this here!!!!

I couldn’t t care less about Metrosmith but these Aerovans are cool. 

Sweden, thank you. 

But life is more fun if you anthropomorphize everything.

IDK my high school teacher dated a student like the minute after she graduated. He was maybe 30-35 and she was 18. Of course, they said the relationship started AFTER she graduated, but that is likely BS.

Make good decisions, people!

“And by “literally” I do not mean “figuratively.””

There used to be a Krispy Kreme on my hospital rounding route so soon after it opened I stopped to pick up a dozen for the nurses at my first stop. They gave me a free donut fresh off the lne. I later learned they do that for everybody, but I thought it was because they had just opened. This had two effects:

If you go to someone’s house for dinner, it’s poor etiquette to *not* eat what has been served.

It amazes me that we can have both Stephen Hawking and these morons living during the same period in time.

One of my coworkers told me she won’t try bacon due to religious reasons.

I, on the other hand, refuse to try religion due to bacon reasons.

Exactly this. Many people have absolutely no concept of how speeds that might feel slow in a car are actually pretty darn fast in terms of human locomotion.

Without context, these videos ARE AWESOME.

The person you are replying to has died from lack of hope.

She lived in Canada while filming Suits. My Canadian friends all use the term ‘courgette.’ Perhaps that’s why she uses it. Better than ‘corgi,’ which my sleep-deprived / not-yet-caffeinated brain thought when I first saw the word!