Three things Pats fans are better at than everyone else:

Yes, New England never “loses”, they just weren’t “100%” like all the other teams are. I see. NFL fans are so very fortunate to have Pats fans around to explain the sport to us dumbbells.

Yes, the immortal Dion Lewis, he would have changed EVERYTHING!!!!!!

Anything beats watching the Pats again...anything.

Good thing a Pats fan generously took the time to explain football to us poor plebians. What would we do without their special brand of football wisdom?

But...but...I thought she didn’t give a fuck and brushed her teeth with a bottle of Jack? You mean her entire persona was just phony? NO WAY!!!

1984, it had snowed the day before, maybe eight inches or so. I picked up a friend and went for a cruise in my trusty Dodge Aspen. I decided it’d be fun to do a few donuts on an almost empty street. There was a brand new Saab parker on the side of the road, some guy took his kids sleigh-riding on a nearby hill. So I’m…