I Know Who You Re-Tweeted Last Summer

Most likely. Milk maidens are notorious hipsters.
"What, you machine milk? That shit is so lamestream. Everyone with an iota of intelligence knows the only way to get the best milk is by hand! Machine milking is so unironically 90's, man."

Or ten gils of blood!

"U got ur Rule 34 in my interview!"

Even better, who owns a copy of Peter Lawford's biography, The Man Who Kept the Secrets? Did you know he went to Marilyn's after her death, and before the cops did, to remove JFK-incriminating evidence? TRUE FACT!

If they made a Dynasty Warriors based on this, I would play the absolute shit out of it.

Wait, you can remove bras now? WHY WAS I NOT INFORMED?!!

Yay! Tarky's back! Now I can continue updating my Tumblr, 'Talkin' 'Merica With Tarky'!