Yeah, yeah, that sounds like great dinner date time conversation.

Yours is because it ignores the very real prospect that a trans woman may face violence due to just existing as a trans person.

So ill ask you the same thing ill ask everyone else.

That is a terrible analogy.

Yeah, which is why I said this:

Gender identity are not the same thing as race

Honesty, I would think that if I was a woman, and a date asked me “Hey, I don’t mean anything offensive but...are you trans?” I would think, that they think, that I look like a non-passing trans woman. And it would make me at the very least rather self conscious.

entire meal with a preop woman and not notice anything slightly amiss?

Well if I’m having a date with a lady, and she knows shes trans, and I don’t know that she is trans, and she knows that I don’t know than she is trans.

Why do you expect me to figure that out for you?

Well also I dont want to be wasting her or mines’ time by waiting a few dates in, or even more so, in the bed room. To find out.

your responsibility to figure

So then thats a yes, ask them right off the bat?

A’ight. So then whats the best way to ask?

So then I should just ask every woman I date if she is cis or trans at the start? I don’t exactly want to be wasting her time or mine.

So then we are back to asking all of my dates at the start?

If I thought I was on a date with a cis woman, and things get hot and heavy, and our pants drop to do the deed, and I find out she is a trans woman. I would feel pretty deceived.

Ok, so ill make sure I ask all of my dates if they where born as a woman. Just to make sure there is no deception.

You keep flip floppin.

So you are saying deception is OK as long as no one asks? That it is not deception if she is passing enough that I don’t think to ask? That is some pretty shady thinking.