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"When scientists discovered that the particles were arriving 60 nanoseconds faster than the speed of light—with only a 10 millisecond error margin"

I got a pretty good laugh out of this, especially the conclusion. Thumbs up

Honestly as one commenter already pointed out it led to some pretty awesome sentences

Please hire somebody, anybody for fuck's sake, to proof these. Seriously. What the fuck.

Apple's new seamless cube! Now with seams!

I came in here to reprimand Giz for piling on her, but when I read 'Oh hey, Rebecca, guess what day it is?' I just started laughing

I agree. I've tried Android twice but went back to iOS both times. I don't hate Android but it's not really for me. The difference between the two is irrelevant, people will prefer using one or the other no matter what the bullet list of features for each looks like

But breaking rules is so much fun

Yeah I'm a genius, that's clearly the only way I could know what surfeit means. And obviously if anyone else doesn't know what it means they're just an idiot

Honestly there's maybe only 15 on this list that are really obscure at all

I just laughed and snorted my drink all over myself because of that first sentence

You know Joe Rogan, this isn't the first time I've had penis in my mouth

I love self checkout, if only for the fact that they mean I never have to deal with a high school student when shopping for groceries

The hype pretty much flopped for me as soon as I saw the trailer. I'll still see it this weekend, but I'm not super excited about it or anything.

This law will be struck down the first time it's challenged

You pretty much nailed it.

You'll lose your jailbreak for sure. Your data should be able to sync just like normal, but keep in mind this isn't a final build and there could be bugs

Yeah, it's just fucking weird

That's one of the most ridiculous straw men I've ever seen propped up