Great speech, and yet totally worthless. Congrats.

He has no contract. His ass should’ve been kicked off the team.

I’d Fister Yu Cantu

Oh god, you’re gonna get killed for not calling them athletes.

CAUSE CAPS LOCK MAKES IT BETTER.

God hates the Cardinals.

God hates the Cardinals.

I’m assuming you’ve chosen to forget how good we’ve become at treating gun shot wounds. I would look that up to if I were you.

Oh god. As if people disliked him enough. Good for him though.

GOD HATES THE CARDINALS.

Can we swap him for Prince or is that not how death works?

Shocking!

I bet Steve Spurrier has the same take on the sabremetricks.

I’m jealous

No. It’s time for promising American kids to stop going to shitty EPL teams.

Shit, the US will lucky to win bronze in 2020.

So if it becomes pregnant, does it turn into a mid-size?

Still the undisputed champion of sports babies. Sorry not sorry

God hates the Cardinals.

He benintended to do that.