I mean, you are the guy who thinks that Trump's cabinet nominees are just all born yesterday, fresh as a daisy, and none of their past or current beliefs or intentions matter…

Your "lady" refers to your shrink, right? :)

I don't know 30 Rock — the girlfriend says that Tina Fey's only fans are washed-up cat ladies and single fat girls who spend their Friday nights with Netflix and a tub of pralines 'n cream.

I like the way you specifically wanted me to know what region of the country you're in. Cute.

Feel free to tell me why you felt the need to pretend as if you were going out tonight.

You know, for someone who's so against generalizations, you sure love slinging 'em out. Where did I ever say I only embraced old stuff? Where did I "brag" about enjoying Westerns, tits and the Stones? I never mentioned that stuff; you dredged it up after profile stalking me. (But it's okay, I understand your intrigue.)

Yeah. You're the kind of washed-up old feminist who gets off more on arguing with men than she does getting fucked. So I have no doubt you're getting all kinds of enjoyment from me tonight. That's fine. It's a Monday night. Monday nights are slow for me.

Threesomes. Take a seat, kid. You speak of my stated passion for Latin tits as if it were in opposition to my current girlfriend. The obvious question being: what makes you assume she doesn't share my appreciation of mocha brown nipples? What makes you assume she's as threatened by the idea of me with other girls as…

Go to bed, lauralee. Your flashbacks to life on the sexual merry-go-round won't do either one of us any good.

How is it that someone who claims to be rational can accept the idea of Russia influencing our elections simply because it denied a Clinton a position of power?

What I said is eminently clear: the fact that companies are choosing the eve of Trump's inauguration to relocate their businesses back to U.S. soil means that a confluence of factors makes right now the most economically feasible time for them to do so.

Or how you think sex positive means you can fuck whoever your like no matter who else gets hurt.

You know, I'm imagining you furiously pecking away at your keyboard while sighing loudly enough to startle your cat. And it amuses the fuck out of me.

You seem put off by the "Latin tits" thing. Don't worry, I've drunkenly considered the occasional pair of pierced 'n tatted SJW tits, too.

Exactly what facet of your shimmering brilliance went over my head there? Or did you think I mistook your snotty little remark for something genuine?

pop open a Bud

Well, my current (and very non-Latin) girlfriend probably wouldn't appreciate that. But I appreciate your support. Sex positive or GTFO, I say.

So I want to be Donald Trump because I have (or once had) an affinity for large-breasted Latin women, Sam Peckinpah films and cranking '70s Stones? What does any of that have to do with Trump? And how does it connect me with Trump's presidency when that's been my profile slogan since about 2010?

Inquisitr, Uncle Sam's Misguided Child, the Daily Mail and the Daily Caller aren't exactly journalistic, dude.

Yeah, nothing to do with Trump.