Kraft: [sighs]

First league investigation of improperly deflated balls that didn't involve PED use.

haha yeah! funnel ball was my shit

If the company can't afford a $10 tip on pizza, they aren't giving out raises or bonuses.

Pizza guy.

Prefacing a statement with "I hate to be that guy" means you don't actually hate being that guy.

New Jersey Nyets.

"would of one"

Good thing security came on the floor, otherwise, those two would have engaged in some aggressive posturing.

The only time I've ever gone to a casino has been with Tommy Craggs. He's obsessed with following the probabilistic rules of proper gambling, focusing on "the process" instead of playing blackjack in a way that might possibly be enjoyable. It's like watching an old man slowly masturbating to CSPAN without any of the…

This thread was really strange. Thumbs up!

For people who need an internet surfing machine, buying a Mac is stupid. Chromebooks are 1/4 the price, more secure, and have more ports.

+1 for funny gif

Spaghetti can be eaten out of anything that's not actually convex. Unless you can turn your convex thing over and eat out of the other side.

When I first started living with my girlfriend (now wife), I stabbed myself a couple times because she left knives and forks pointy ends up. If that's what's going on here, I cannot abide.

Never, ever, EVER, use the Internet to prove your wife wrong.

I just made $1,600 from my COUCH by visting Stubhub's website!! You can too!! Just go to www.goog.le11.1/ttic/23r23 now for information on how you can turn your life around with little to no effort!!!

The New York Jets need a new coach and a new general manager, and they've been asking a lot of people around the league if they might be interested in interviewing for the latter job.