It used to be I was just worried about being put on social media holding a beer. Heh.

WHAT IS BILLS MAY NEVER DIE

“Everybody has a plan until they get a $70 million-dollar contract.”

Looks like the faucets aren’t the only thing spitting fire in Flint.

They looked pretty mediocre on Hard Knocks. When HBO production can’t mask your ineptitude, you are in for a long season.

That looks like so much work...

The latter just put their starting QB on injured-reserve. I would argue they are mediocre at losing, at best.

Meh, you’re assuming that (potential) success would also be realized at the Browns, who are corrently continuing the longest-running Schrodinger’s QB experiment in the league.

I’ve found fandom to be approximately 80% hating other teams as well as your own, 15% purgatory plateau, 5% actual happiness, albeit in fleeting moments.

My girlfriend adamantly refuses to watch The Princess Bride. Will I ever find my soulmate?

...ending the conference with “M’lady.”

It appears they’re capable of choking even in the offseason.

If social media had existed since the dawn of man, what would’ve been the hottest take of all time?

What’s the furthest you’ve ever gotten into a book before putting it down and refusing to finish?