The top seed from both divisions conferences will have a bye the first week of the playoffs...

A primitive tool with coarse bristles that I use to never clean my dishwasher filter.

6.5 years. That’s how long it took me to realize that my husband had been regularly cleaning our dishwasher while I just assumed it took care of itself. Only came out on a recent trip to Home Depot. Whoops. 

She said she was attracted to his virginity. It was over before it ever really started.

“We eventually started scheduling monthly sex just to try and get back into the groove, but even that fell apart.

I was the one who ended it with her as she told me she no longer loved me.

There does come a point where it’s just not worth it, though.
My last car, I hit 300,000 miles and almost immediately tore up the protective cover under the car by running over a curb I didn’t see. Went in to get it fixed and they told me I also needed new shocks and struts, which would have been about a $2,000 job for…

With all due respect, Absolutely zero of this shit makes saving for retirement “easier”.

She was fit and attractive. Now, after a year, she is smug, fit and attractive.

This is what so many body image messages are about. It’s thin people getting...the same. They were already thin. How is that even encouraging? Yes, you too can be like this person who was already genetically gifted or held to a strict regimen by a team of rich-person coaches and life organizers!

What I don’t get is how this woman claims getting the bike “changed her.” There is no visible way in which she has changed over the year. She was already thin and toned. I guess she just gets up earlier now?

O.K.A.Y.

Screw this.  If k or ok does the job that is what I am using.  If you can’t handle it.....too bad.

I came here for the popcorn scene. Where’s my popcorn scene dammit?

It’s a chemical laser but in solid, not gaseous, form. Put simply, in deference to you, Kent, it’s like lasing a stick of dynamite. As soon as we apply a field, we couple to a state that is radiatively coupled to the ground state. I figure we can extract at least ten to the twenty-first photons per cubic…

It’s about time.

He’s a baby. Everything makes him cry.

i charged my nokia 3310 last time in 2002 still got 80% battery left.

those old dumb phones did have a huge battery life

Lifehacker: “PrEtenD yOUr pHoNe is dYiNG”
Also Lifehacker: “Here are the affiliate links to our favorite USB travel batteries for under $20"

I do love a hot take.