Smoothies in 0.01 sec!

If they supported Sanders so fervently and wanted him to win the primary, they could have changed their voter registration so they could actually vote for Sanders in the primary. However, that would have required them to carry around a little card in their wallets that says “D” instead of “I”, and it’s clear that “I”…

And in such quantities that he swept the primaries!  No, wait.

Joe Biden hasn’t quite won over America’s Millennials and Zoomers. In fact, Biden is reportedly fairing worse than Hillary Clinton with the under-40 set: His lead among 18 to 34-year-olds is narrower than Clinton’s was to President Trump during the last stretch of the 2016 election cycle. But no need to fear! Most…

Twitter Inc., being a private company, doesn’t need any additional authority to put disclaimers on any “tweet” they want. It could be argued that if Twitter Inc. decides to edit a user’s posts to say something the original post didn’t have then they may have exceeded their authority, but on the other hand Fox “News”, o…

That is not a park-on-the-shoulder-and-pretend-like-you’re driving-fast sort of photo, it is a pull-over-and-stop-the-car-to-neck sort of photo. Admittedly they should have turned off down a side road for safety’s sake, but you know how it is when you’re distracted by a member of the opposite sex, thoughts of “safety”…

I’m sure there’s that one thing (cue falsetto) that Trump delivers to his fans that accounts for some of their worshipfullness. But you really should not ignore the other vital quality he has got with which they relate, in defiance to those people who lack that quality.

The main line of defense is clearly, “Your Honor, my client is far too stupid to have knowingly committed this crime. Or any crime. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, just look at him! The intersection between ‘knowingly’ anything and my client’s actions in any conceivable circumstances is a obviously an absolute void.…

Drink the good stuff today! You deserve it. Go crack one open right now.

What did you do with them, put them in the freezer? The last couple months, every time I go to the grocery store, I buy bananas and strawberries for smoothies, but I always use them up the first week, because bananas go bad so fast.

I just finished off a pot of canned tuna and rice not fifteen minutes ago.

On my last trip to the booze shop, being down toward the bottom of my bottle of Scotch, I got a bottle of Oban, but I haven’t opened it yet. That stuff is for occasions. At the same time I got 1.75L of George Dickel #12, which I drink on ordinary days, which by now is about halfway gone.

After all, they made your iPhone.

I bought a used ‘93 Miata and I loved it, but it got rear-ended by a pickup truck and totalled. When I went to buy a replacement, I also looked for an MR2, but I couldn’t find any used ones in my price range within a 100-mile radius so I got a ‘99 Miata, which I loved. When I replaced that one, as well as shopping for…

Manufacturers could appeal to budget-minded buyers
by simply putting a second outside tread on the inside.
When the outside tread got worn thin,
the owner could put the worn side thin side inside,
and the skin side inside outside,
and thus could turn them inside outside.

“Aryan” is almost, but not quite, as laughworthy as “Caucasian.” See, around two hundred years ago, there was this German fellow named Dr. Blumenbach, a famous connoisseur of skulls. One time he happened to travel to Caucasia, where he saw and instantly fell in love with a pale-skinned shepherd lad. (Physical…

Since Americans are imbecilic spoiled children, I probably won’t be able to go to a restaurant for another year. In several countries where they successfully teach kids arithmetic in grade school, citizens have shown enough self-control to get the COVID infection rate down to an insignificant level so they can open…

Yep, two weeks. In another week the Texas daily death rate will rise.

Followed very shortly by an article about Florida.

It’s no harder to believe than that the SCANDAL!!!!! about the Clintons investing $100,000 and losing every cent of it in Whitewater, which was prosecuted all the way to impeachment. When insiders make financial investments based on their inside knowledge, they generally end up with a profit. But it becomes a…